Dumblebum!

So, I understand that Dumbledore dies on page 596 in the latest Harry Potter tome. It’s about time they admitted this fact. I watched the first movie (through someone’s dining room window, since I live in a VAN and didn’t have cable that year), and the actor was this one guy, and then I watched the third movie and realized that it wasn’t even the same guy. It appears Dumbledore died between books two and three, and there was a big cover-up.

I read the first book, “Harry Potter and the Gallstones of Death”, only because I was stuck at the bus stop and had nothing better to do for fifteen minutes. I never read the second one, “Harry Potter and the Chamberpot of Fire” or “Harry Potter and the French Tutor”, let alone the others. I think there are about seven or eight by now. I think they started going downhill with, “Harry Potter and the Nyquil Halucinations.” Just do like I do and wait for the neighbors to rent the movies on DVD… don’t rush to Amazon.com to buy whatever the latest one is called, “Harry Potter and the Half-Assed Excuse for a Book,” I think. Remember, women don’t like men who read, and especially not ones who read 8th grade fantasy novels about a pubescent warlock and his little pals at boarding school.

I have to buy me one of these T-shirts, and wear it to the next Dr. Grouchy movie night at the elementary school.